A few people are so disappointed as a result of issues with their relatives that it begins influencing their association with their companion. This article contains some valuable tips that can help you to handle this issue all the more proficiently.
We all know that marriage is not just union of two individuals, but that of two families. There are some lucky people who can really bond well with their mothers-in-law after marriage and do not face any major challenges in dealing with their new families. However, others are not so lucky and their mothers-in-law are constantly nagging them with advice and/or suggestions. Mother-in-law problems can be such a big issue that many couples feel like avoiding their in-laws, though this is not a sensible solution.
How to Deal
Problems with mothers-in-law faced by married women are much talked about all over the world. But, that does not mean that men do not face this problem. Many a time, men too find themselves nagged or taunted by their mothers-in-law. Here are some tips that will help both the husband and the wife to address this issue in a better manner:
- Set Limits:
When mothers-in-law give suggestions or advice, it may not be with any ill intention. Rather, they tend to feel that by doing so, they are making your life more comfortable. However, there should be a limit and you need to let them know that they cannot interfere in any and every family-related issues. When you encounter any such situation where you do not want her interference, tell her so firmly but politely. This way, she can understand her own limits.
- Communicate with your Spouse:
Talk to your spouse frankly about the things that are bothering you. If the two of you avoid discussing the issue, it can snowball into a bigger marital problem that can strain your personal relationship permanently. Your partner should be aware of the problems that exist between you and your mother-in-law. Even he/she may come up with some excellent solution to tackle this issue. After all, your spouse knows their mother better than you do. This tip also applies to people who are planning to get married soon. Communicating with your would-be spouse will definitely help in eliminating future problems.
- Be Strong:
There is bound to be a constant internal conflict that goes on in your mind when you are dealing with such problems. Your parents have taught you to respect your elders, but you are in such a situation where you are going against the wishes of someone older than you. Do not feel upset and remind yourself that you are doing this to maintain harmony. Be strong and do not let such thoughts affect you. You cannot let someone dominate you all your life. When you are strong headed, even the snide remarks made by your mother-in-law will not bother you much.
- Respect Each Other:
Respect your mother-in-law as an individual. You may not agree with what she says, but you cannot forget that she is the mother of your spouse. She has taken a lot of pains to bring up her child, whom you love so much. You cannot afford to ignore this fact. When she is expressing her opinion, listen to her with full attention and then you are free to decline her ideas politely. When you stay calm and resolve the matter patiently, she will not shout at you. When you show her the respect she deserves, she will also reciprocate the same for you.
Mother-in-law problems during pregnancy get aggravated, as she gets over-zealous about the whole episode. It is advisable to avoid any confrontations during this period, as it may cause you a lot of stress, which is not good for you and your baby. Try to make her feel important in various activities, like taking her to the doctor’s appointment, and she will not feel left out any more. Those who are planning to tie the knot soon must discuss this matter with their spouses before marriage and agree upon a limit for the mothers-in-law to be.